Today only. Outback Steakhouse is offering a free Bloomin' Onion with purchase when you mention Ryan Newman's top 10 finish at the Spring Cup. Here's their restaurant locator to plan your Sprint Cup win.
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Wonder if you also get a discount on the required triple bypass that comes with it?
If they ask me who Ryan Newman is then I am screwed.
Randy Newman.Got it.
Do they offer free shipping?
If they ask me what a "Spring Cup" is then I am screwed.
So I took this nice girl on a date there last night. We started out slow, got some drinks. Passed some small talk and flirtatous smiles. Things were going good. Our waitress came back and asked if we were ready for appetizers. This is when I decided to "seal the deal" I told the waitress that I knew Ryan Newman. She perked up and smiled and said "oh"
"Well I have something for YOU!" She said while ushering off to attend to my request.
I looked over at my date. She appeared in a start struck state. "So you know Ryan Newman?" she said with a smile.
I confidently nodded and dropped a clean cool "Yeap"
It seems I had changed the game with that one slick move. Within seconds I could feel a foot rubbing up my leg! I had to maintain control. I was getting excited. I regained my focus and continued small talk and suffered from this tremendous increasing level of hormones.
The waitress returned with our plunder.
A Giant Bloomin Onion!
My heart skipped a beat as I took a deep breath and dove right in!
Long story short Bens Bargains got me sex.
Wow, lucky you. That's a two hard-on story. If you added a few more paragraphs describing the events of your last sentence, I'm sure you could get a full five hard-on rating and maybe you'll even have material worthy for submission to Penthouse Magazine...