Amazon has the Gerber 31-000700 Bear Grylls Survival Series Basic Kit for $14 with free shipping on $25+. Features lightweight nylon bag and includes fire starter, emergency whistle, Gerber Mini-Paraframe knife, windproof matches, snare wire and more.
Also comes with a hotel reservation for when you're out "surviving."
Does it come with a cup, so I can drink my own pee?