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Are these ocean-minded, like being bathed in fish crap? Or do they relentlessly beat your feet like pounding surf, wearing away your skin and changing the landscape of your peds? Or are these ocean-minded like they have crevices that will never be explored or cleaned? Is there no real way to measure them? Do they get bigger as it gets warmer? Do they act like a CO2 sink? Mutate your DNA with a surface that reflects ultra-violet? NOPE. From OM's marketing gurus: The Ocean Minded brand enables an individual to identify, visualize and embrace their personal beach and water-oriented passions in the course of their daily adventure. There's a whole emotive dissertation about the higher meaning of overpriced flip-flops as you Live. Protect. Respect. Looks like another marketing job saved or created. Maybe two. The company points out that Since 1996, they have been organizing community beach clean-ups around the world, and educating our customers on the importance of leaving their chosen playgrounds in better condition that [sic-too much pot to proof read] when they were found. Oh boy, not just community organizers, they are beach community organizers who help the huddled masses avoid glass and use trash cans. You know, the stuff my mother taught you (well, some of you).

I bet Al Gore (may he cool Gaia) is a director. Hey Al, have a cigar, you've gone far. A $57 flip-flop? <barf>

Sorry you feel inadequate and angry, #1. Maybe focus your energy on something more productive, eh?